I believe that part of being made in the Image of God is having creative potential. We can take our resources and transform them into something more usable and more powerful. It is true that as kids, we don't have much say-so over our lives. However, as adults, if we really look at our lives, I believe we'll see where every consequence was preceded by some action or inaction on our part. Take money for example. Many of us are one paycheck from being homeless because of a series of decisions we've made or consented to regarding our finances. Even those who have chosen to do nothing have still given their consent to their current state.
I've often heard the scripture, "death and life are in the power of the tongue. In response, many of us have been told to be careful of what we say. I see it differently. We speak mindless words all day. We are greeted all day long with a "Hi! How ya doing?" "Fine," we say. Yet at the end of the day, we feel no better. Sometimes, we feel even worse. Maybe the power isn't so much in the words. Perhaps, the power is in the tongue - the one who is speaking. After all, if you keep turning the pages, you'll come upon another scripture, "out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks." Words are just words. It's the belief behind those words that holds the power.
What do you believe about yourself? About your situation?
Several years ago, I remember complaining to my life coach that I felt alone. "My friends are too busy for me," I whined. "They are involved with their own families and lives and I'm tired of having to schedule time just to hang out with them." To this, she said, "If your friends don't have time for you, then it's because you want it that way. Your reality is exactly what you've made it." Whut? I blinked with disbelief and stared at my cell phone. I couldn't believe she said that. As much as I dreamed of having the neighbor, like Rhoda on The Mary Tyler Moore Show, who dropped by just because or the unconditional friendship of Joan Clayton (Tracy Ellis Ross) and her sisterfriends on the sitcom, Girlfriends. She was sooooo way off base, right? Wrong! What I said I wanted and my actions were not the same. I seldom accepted invitations to events or gatherings. At the time, my standing excuse was being a single parent, or work, or short notice. "You are teaching your friends that you don't need them," she said.
"Write down who you are. Write down what you want." This, she encouraged me to do and asked me read aloud. "I am a warm, cozy person." "Okay," she said. "I want warm, cozy friends" She interrupted, "who can't wait to spend time with you." My eyes filled with tears as the real real became clear. I didn't truly feel worthy of that. Even though I hated it and complained about it, deep inside, I didn't feel valuable enough to ask for different. "You are a warm, cozy person that e-e-e-everyone wants to be around." Hearing her say that to me was transforming. The strength of those words awakened that knowing in my heart. I felt the change.
She also challenged me to accept some invitations. To show an interest in what others were doing and to invite them into what I was doing. Rather than working and coming home, I began to seek people who had a common interest. Thank God for meetup.com. The very first group I joined was the Single Parent Group. I met some wonderful people who welcomed me into their circle and embraced me. That single action was the portal to greater esteem. Now, I have a broad and diverse network of warm and cozy people.
The cosmic waiter, as my coach called him, took my order and brought me what I asked for. To me, God honored my prayer and gave me over and above what I asked. For he didn't just give me warm, cozy friends. He helped me see that I deserved them.
