The Sound of My Life: More from Jackie (Part 3)

Freedom Morning

There it was again.  That torturous theme that wakes me up crying and in so much emotional pain.  Trying to talk to someone and they refuse to listen to me.  I don't know what happened in my child hood that was so traumatic that I have this recurring dream...READ MORE  

Today I posted invitations to my book launch. I am so excited about April 6th. Already people are securing their spots with free tickets through Eventbrite's website, http://www.thesoundofmylife.eventbrite.com. Today, I reread my book as if I was a reader. I found some small things that needed to be tweaked here and there, but all and all, it is ready. Once I've gotten back the copyright information, the book will be ready to ship. Until then, we'll take pre-orders so that folks will be able to receive their book early enough to have it at the launch..READ MORE.

Book Launch Exactly A Month Away

Book cover....CHECK!
Landing page being developed...CHECK!

It's exactly 30 days until my book launch.  The excitement is growing and I feel it inside.  I ate breakfast and lunch today....CHECK!  Oh so important.  I got to practice what I preach.  I tell the folks I coach to take extraordinary self care, so I've made a pact with myself to do the same. 

My sweet boyfriend came over yesterday and let me put my feet in his lap while he looked at television and I typed on the laptop.  He wouldn't let me kiss him with my Tilapia and onion breath though.  Got to show him where in the manual it says the boyfriend is suppose to let the girlfriend kiss him no matter what...lol. 

It's those times that keep us grounded and sane.  Love, light and positive energy.  No drama.  No negativity allowed.  Nothing but staying open so that I can flow with where God is growing me to.  When I'm not concentrating on all that I have to do, I actually feel like I'm walking on water.

You know that Bible story in the New Testament where the disciples are in the boat and fear Jesus walking towards them on the water.  They think he's a ghost at first.  But that daredevil Peter says to him,"If you are Jesus, bid me to come and walk on the water."  Jesus simply answers, "Come."  Who in their right mind, not knowing if it's Jesus or not, would get out of the boat?  Most folks wouldn't. 

I thought about that as I meditated today and talked with God about all that's happening around me.  At first, I was lying in bed talking with him nonchalantly but something else took over and before I knew it, I sat straight up in the bed and with tears streaming down my face declared, "You told me when I was a child, 'Don't put me in a box.  I'm too big for that.' "  If You're outside the box, then I want to be too.  Bid me to join you!!  I don't want anything the box has.  I don't want to be confined.  I want to walk on the water with you.  And I don't want to get back in the boat (limitation) unless you are getting into the boat too."  I meant that thang, y'all.  I meant it down to my very bones. 

God is a GREAT BIG God.  And I want his predetermined GREAT BIGNESS for my life.  It's enough.  I don't have to be like anybody else or covet what anyone else has.  I don't have to measure my success by any other standard.  If it rings true for me, then that's enough.  Not everybody is going to be monetarily rich whether they employ me as their life coach or enroll in my coaching program.  But if it's what is needed for them to fulfill their purpose in life, then nothing will be able to stop money from running after them, jumping them and filling their accounts.  The wealth is to tap into your authentic core.  You own unique sound.  And I know I'm gifted to lead those who want to go.  How that will manifest in your life, only God knows.  This I do know though.  You'll feel alive as you follow.  The more attuned you become to that Knowing inside of you, that North Star, the more joy, contentment and satisfaction you'll have with your life.  This is what I'm living and this is why I'm so excited.  I'm listening, I'm staying true and when I feel myself deviating or being moved by my ego, I take a deep breath, check back in again and ask God for help so that I stay true to myself.  I know the sound of my truest self.  That's where the power lies!!!

Book Launch Prep is Accelerating

The closer the book launch gets the more accelerated things are becoming.  Interimly however, I've heard such great well-wishes from folks.  Some believe that the book is going to be a best seller and have encouraged me to imagine it, claim it, look for it and all the other it's.  Despite my efforts to mindmeld with the faith of what they are saying, something inside of me has been resisting it.  I didn't fully understand.  When I first felt that resistance, I attributed it to not wanting to be disappointed.  You know how we do.  We believe that if we don't get our hopes up, we won't be disappointed if it doesn't happen.  Now that I have had time to get centered and tune in to my Wise Self, I believe I understand why there is a caution.

I have to keep my ego in check.  I'm no different from the next person in that.  I just strive to stay conscious to what trips me up or takes me out of that centered place.  When I move from cooperating with my Wiser Self to having to prove something, it takes me out of authentic grace to fear-induced anxiety.  It's so easy to slip back.  I am very mindful of that.  A main message of my book is to tune in to the sound of your wiser voice.  Not the ego voice.  Not the voice of society.  Not the voice of the overachiever.  That pure voice that knows what you must do, when you must do it, and taps you on the shoulder when it's time.    

That voice never leads you wrong.  It has no other agenda but to move you from where you are to Something Greater.  Isn't that wonderful!  It leads and guides without forethought of what other people will think or if you will fail.  It simply beckons you to follow it.  Above all that my ego can fathom - which normally is material in some way, shape or form - the purest part of me simply wants to live in harmony with that voice.  So, honestly, I don't care what vehicle the God of the Universe has selected to take me there.  I truly believe the book plays a part but I'm not certain of how yet.  So, I don't want to read into it, I just want to be ever hearing and ever following the sound.  Freedom to follow the sound of my own voice--yes!  No limits.  No boundaries.  Just imagining it in my God-likeness and doing all that that imagination evokes.  That is it. 

Tapping Into the Joy

When I woke up this morning, I was so tired.  The adrenalin of last week, gone!  It's my fault.  I was so enmeshed in prelaunch details last week that I didn't eat like I was suppose to.  I didn't take my vitamins for two days straight.  And I stayed up nightly past 12 midnight.  So not the right thing to do.  Trust, my body is letting me know it now. 

I've got a lot to do; yet, trying to urge my body from underneath those covers on a beautiful Saturday morning, not!  Rather than fight with myself, I called my sister on the phone and sang happy birthday to her.  We talked and that was energizing.  She read to me Debbie Ford's words that she had found online.  We went to her website and breathed them in together.  Such a dynamic woman who transitioned into eternity just a couple of weeks ago.  She was 57.  I hate I didn't follow her journey while she was alive.  Nevertheless, she has left quite a legacy for all who remain.  Such a rich life!

Life isn't about a laundry list of things to do, but simply being out loud. 

No Debbie didn't write that, I just did.  That was fresh out of my awareness.  As I reflect back to earlier this week, I got seduced back into the urgency of the doing.  The more I made that my focus, the more tired I became.  Trying to finalize the book cover, we did edit after edit after edit until I felt us all losing steam.  In that moment, I heard my Wise Self say, "It's not about perfection."  In that moment, I was reminded of what I already knew.  Perfect covers don't sell books.  So I breathed and released it. 

Same thing with trying to select just 15 images when there are 152 phenomenal photographs to choose from.  I solicited help of friends and my Business Strategist to help me to narrow it down.  As life would have it, none of us had the same tastes or the same preferences.  Again, my Wise Self intervened, "What is it about you that you want people to see?  What pictures best capture that?"  So, I'm forwarding those selections to the photographer.  Besides, it's not like he's going to destroy the others.  So I breathed and released it.   

Herein lies the self monitoring function of your Wise Self.  He or she reminds you of the bigger intention.  What's most important in the grand scheme of your life.  Having taken a step back, I see that the more caught up I got in doing, the more my ego was taking center stage.  And the more my ego took center stage, the less mindful I became of me.  My ego was draining me, concentrating on all that stuff.  The brief station break with my sister brought me back.  I felt the joy of the moment.  It reminded me of the joy I feel when I am centered and rested.  All that needs to be done gets done.   

So I have declared this as flow with it day.  Nothing forced, just tapping into the joy and letting that effervesce in whatever way it chooses.  And I will stop to eat.