"But it hurts," you might argue. You're right. It does hurt. It's uncomfortable. It feels weird to allow your heart to open. After all, you're scared. So, let me offer some wisdom. Some heart-opening wisdom, how about that.
Get up and get out
Come outside your four walls. There is something symbolic about leaving your house or leaving your normal routine. It's coloring outside the lines. It creates an energy that allows new experiences.
Safe places only
Refuse. And I'll say it again, REFUSE unsafe situations. I don't care if it's expected, familiar or you said you would. Put your heart FIRST. I know it might subject you to criticism. I know that. I can almost guarantee that it will. Expect it and put your heart first anyway.
Look for warm folks, warm spirits, warm venues that feel like a warm blanket being pulled up around you. Open in that space. Touch and allow yourself to be touched. See and allow yourself to be seen. Hear and allow yourself to be heard. Breathe and allow others to breathe you. Taste and allow yourself to be tasted. Engage your five senses when discerning warmth or warm blanket moments.
Take a piece of it with you
Make a connection and add it to your life. Perhaps you were walking in the park and felt such a rich energy fill you. Take a picture or pick up a leaf, a branch, something that you can take home with you. For my creative folks, you can finesse it and place it somewhere in your home that you can look at and feel that energy again.
Or perhaps you met someone that made you feel so good...so good just being around them. Square your shoulders and invite them in by asking for their phone number or a way to connect with them. Perhaps they are a speaker who talked your language. They made you feel seen and heard. Most of all, they inspired you! They lifted you. If they are too busy for a one-on-one, no matter. Google them, go on their website, immerse yourself in more of that feeling by experiencing them indirectly. Go to another event where they will be speaking or that they are involved in. Purchase their books. Purchase their CD. Bring it home with you.
Recreate your environment
"So how long do I have to do this?," you might ask. Do it again and again and again until you feel your heart open. Get up and get out...again. Place yourself in safe places only... again. Take a piece of it with you..again. Do it again until you feel your heart heal. Do it again until you feel your heart love.
If you commit to doing these things consciously and consistently, you'll recreate your environment. You'll create a new experience of your life. Loneliness has no choice but to fade. You'll find yourself surrounded with what feeds you and nurtures you so that you can live again. You will stop objectifying people, places or things with mistrust or as the cure for your loneliness. Rather, you'll see your own power to fill yourself. You will trust yourself to apply the salve that will heal what's broken or what's painful or what's isolating instead of looking at something else to do it. You'll create a space for love. A loving heart is a happy heart. A loving heart is a full heart. It's full no matter where you are and it's wise in knowing how to sustain that fullness.
Maybe you're feeling a little shy about starting or simply sense I am a safe place and you'd like to talk to me, I'm ready to listen. Contact me at coachsuzette@purposeful-connections.com. Regardless, know this: you matter!
